27 March, 2009

Humph.

Throughout my life I have undergone a great deal of preparation to be a mother. I have always looked forward to parenthood, and although I am 24 and as of yet unmarried, I do have faith that all these experiences will be of use to me someday, if they haven't been already. In high school I worked at a daycare during the summer, volunteered st Seattle Children's Hospital, and tutored elementary school kids in reading. It was a blast. I always dreaded leaving my job at the daycare each fall when school started again, because I would really much rather hang out with little kids all day than go to high school. Then again, who wouldn't?

When I got back from my mission a nanny job sort of fell into my lap, and I worked full-time there for about nine months until I started school again, then worked part-time until they let me go in December (this economic downturn affects all, even the very very rich). So basically I feel about as prepared to be a mother as I could be without actually having undergone the birth/raising a baby process itself.

Apparently, God disagrees.

I have a dog, and although I love him dearly, I would say it is a different kind of love than the love I feel for humans. However, having a dog is excellent preparation for parenthood. Because of Sego, I have to get up in the morning at a reasonable hour even if I am so tired I want to die, because he has needs that need to be met. Much of my money goes towards meeting his basic needs, even though I would much rather be spending my money on books or scarves. Also, parenthood is often dirty and disgusting, and so is owning a dog. Dogs bring a certain amount of chaos to your life, and so do children. I use Sego as a litmus test for possible romantic partners, because (this is true) I want lots of kids, and if someone can't handle the chaos supplied by one 24-pound dog, NO WAY are they going to handle living with five or six (or you know, whatever) kids.

Anyway, about the "disgusting" part. Last night Sego seemed a little under the weather, so I let him sleep in my bed. I usually do this only if one of us is feeling down. Generally it's me. Anyway, I had a really hard time sleeping last night, so I didn't work out this morning and slept in for a while. When I woke up, I felt sort of cold and clammy, and though I sometimes sweat when I sleep (if I'm sick or something) it didn't quite feel like that.

I woke up and examined my bed, and Sego had puked ALL OVER MY BED. And by extension, me as well.

GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS GROSS EWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

Thusly, I am skipping class to do laundry this morning, so my roommate (a cat person) won't come home to the MOST DISGUSTING SCENE OF ALL TIME.

OK, God. I get it.

2 comments:

Ashley said...

Yeah...I'm pretty sure that there is some amount of my baby's puke on several items of clothing I'm wearing at the moment (almost 12:30 and Mommy's still in pajamas...awesome).

At first I was really diligent about tossing stuff in the dirty laundry when she puked on it, but now I just kinda go with it. Though baby throw-up is much less disgusting than dog throw-up, I'll give you that.

TheMoncurs said...

Gag. Been there. Done that. Got the merit badge. You are definitely prepared.