Showing posts with label I LOVE TO EAT. Show all posts
Showing posts with label I LOVE TO EAT. Show all posts

01 December, 2010

Not Being Naked: day 21

Today I worked at a fancy shmancy hotel. Which was awesome because I got a free lunch and paid a very good salary. It was sad because I was not an official member of the company party (I was just the typist) so when they brought in the free brownies, there was not one for me. This is how that made me feel:




This is me being sad in a fancy shmancy hotel mirror, wearing white blouse + brown skirt + red necklace + red superhero boots. One of the executives told me I looked "adorable." She had a cool haircut, so I trust her opinion. This is me lookin' at my boots, bein' sad 'cause I didn't get a brownie.

25 November, 2010

Not Being Naked: day 15

I put on clothes today, guys!! A dress, even.

black t-shirt + black leggings + short red dress + no shoes = 10/10 for comfort and bliss

Things I am Thankful for:

1. My badass family
2. My beautiful friends
3. Good music
4. Star Wars
5. Tofurkey
6. Jim Henson
7. Sego
8. Podcasts
9. Texting
10. Hot water
11. Cuddling
12. Jesus
13. Snow days
14. Being barefoot
15. Scrabble
16. Books
17. Missions
18. Persimmons
19. Lists
20. Everything

14 June, 2010

The Seven Deadly Sins, Day 5: Gluttony

I have learned a very sad fact about myself. Setting a goal to do the same thing every day for one month is too much for me. Unless that thing is:

1. Taking my vitamins.
2. Flossing my teeth.
3. Charging my phone.
4. Taking my dog to the park.
5. Staying away from drugs and alcohol.

In short, I have no discipline. Sorry I was MIA all weekend, guys.

To be fair, my mom was in town this weekend AND it was my aunt Maurine's birthday party and there were lots and lots of events, social and otherwise, that required my attention. Also, I went to church twice because somehow I thought that would make up for missing the first 15 minutes of Sacrament. I do not know why. Maybe I just really like church. Anyway.

Gluttony! It's a fun word. I think I am guilty of gluttony like, every day. That should be obvious, because I am overweight. How else could you explain it? Do you think I have some sort of gland problem? Heck no. I eat too much = getting fat = sad and alone. Luckily, I am working on eating less and have lost an undisclosed amount of weight. I am proud of myself for this.

Here are some foods that make NOT being gluttonous really hard for me, because they are so delicious.

1. Chocolate milk.


2. Macaroni and cheese.


3. White chocolate chip and Macadamia nut cookies.


4. Curly fries.


5. Nachos.

Vegetarian Nachos

6. Banana ice cream. Not ice cream with a banana on top of it, you idiot. BANANA ICE CREAM. The only kind of ice cream I really can't live without. If you know me, you know this.


7. Mayonnaise. I know mayonnaise isn't by definition bad, but eating too much of it definitely is. Also, is this picture creepy or what?


Me: I love mayonnaise.
DHB: That's disgusting.
Me: I know. Do you still love me?
DHB: No.

8. Twix bars.


9. Mozzarella sticks.


10. Waffles with all kinds of crap on top.


11. Anything that Bob and I think might taste good deep-fried. This hobby is much more dangerous than drinking alcohol.

01 June, 2010

I can't Believe I Haven't Blogged About X, Day 1: Sandwiches




I can't believe I haven't devoted an entire blog post to how much I love sandwiches. I have mentioned them offhand once or twice, but not once have I given sandwiches their due, considering how deeply I care for them.

I really love sandwiches, guys.

Here's the thing. I hate cooking. Well, that's not entirely true. I like cooking for other people, and I like following recipes. When it comes to cooking with Bob or Greg or Ashley, I can't get enough, because they tell me what to do and whatever we come up with is always delicious. However, I am not a creative or recreational cook. I do not like eating enough to bother making exotic, complex meals for myself. I do not like opening a cupboard and figuring out how to make dinner without having an idea of what I want to make beforehand. I will be a lousy housewife. But we all knew that already.

I am a vegetarian, as you know, so most of my meals consist of plant ingredients. I could be quite happy subsisting on rabbit foods for an inordinately long time. In fact, I recall that my sophomore year in college, I ate only raisins, almonds, celery, apples, and vegetarian corn dogs (which I could also easily devote an entire blog post to). Not coincidentally, this was when I was at my thinnest and sexiest. If MorningStar hadn't stopped carrying those magnificent corn dogs, I would totally go back on that diet.

Anyway, my point is, I don't mind eating the same food over and over, and I am often too intimidated to try COOKING something new because I'm afraid of screwing it up. It's true. I ruin everything. I have ruined macaroni and cheese.

Enter sandwiches. Easy. Delicious. Impossible to ruin. Endless possibilities.

I suppose that technically, one could ruin a sandwich, but even I haven't managed to do that yet. Burning grilled cheese sandwiches doesn't count, seeing as that's not a cooking issue, but rather a "I am retardedly impatient and have ADHD" issue.

Oh yeah! I just remembered that my sophomore year of college I invented the Peanut Butter and Lettuce sandwich. So I must have eaten that too, back in 2005.

Here are some of my favorite sandwiches to eat:

1. Veggie burger of some kind with traditional/non-traditional hamburger-esque ingredients: lettuce, tomato, mushrooms, avocado, mayonnaise, mustard, pickles, etc.

2. I have blogged about this specific sandwich before, but I should just reiterate that grilled Muenster cheese + raspberry jam + sliced pears = bliss in my mouth.

3. Also courtesy of Robbie, strawberries + cream cheese + nutella = much delicious, though not very nutritious.

4. The aforementioned peanut butter and lettuce sandwich probably sounds gross, because it kinda is, however the overarching idea is that peanut butter tastes good with lots of things, not just jam. For example, peanut butter and sprouts is really good. Peanut butter + honey + sprouts + banana = surprisingly good and fibrous.

5. I ate poultry and fish when I was in high school, which was when I discovered the wonder that is the Thanksgiving Leftover Sandwich: turkey, cranberry sauce, cream cheese, lettuce, tomato, and whatever else you want. Well, turns out that kind of sandwich is good without turkey, too.

Please excuse me while I leave to go eat a sandwich.

12 April, 2009

Things I've never done before, week 2

This week, as Vilja wrote, my "new experience" was going to be snowboarding for the first time, which promised to be both hilarious and humiliating. An excellent blogatunity. Alas, the weather was so darn nice this week (Not that I'm complaining!!! No sir!) that the slopes were closed, so Vilja, Lori and I missed our chance to fall on our butts on the bunny hill and possibly get beaned in the back of the head by a ski lift. I am positive that would have happened to me.

Anyway, since my plan fell through, I was conscious of my need to do new things this week, and possibly went a little overboard. Here are all the things I did this week for the first time:

Monday: nude modeled (at the Bridge Art Academy)
Wednesday: participated in a Passover Seder (I have been to them before, but I was always working so I didn't really participate)
Thursday: wrote a 15-page paper in less than 24 hours

I bet you want me to write about what happened on Monday, don't you? Too bad. It wasn't even that interesting. It was exactly like modeling at BYU, except instead of a bikini, I was wearing nothing. I underwent no psychological changes, felt no new feelings, and had no weird experiences. So there. Although afterwards, when I was at a party on Friday, I actually ran into the teacher of the class, while I was with my roommate who also nude models at the same art academy. While we were sitting with him on the couch and chatting, he at one point smiled and said, "Hey, I've seen everyone on this couch naked!" It wasn't that funny.

Anyway, today I did something really cool and awesome for the first time: I made homemade pasta! This was an especially neat milestone in my life because this was one of the many items on the list of "things to do before I die" that I made when I was 19. Other items include:

1. Be an extra in a disaster movie.
2. Learn a language spoken by less than one million people.
3. Build a model volcano and induce an eruption.
4. Have sex outside.
5. Memorize all the hymns in the hymnbook

There are others, but I am too lazy to look them up. Plus you know too much already.

Anyway, "make homemade pasta" was like number 27 or something like that on my list, and today I did it, thanks to my friend Joe! I love you Joe! We used his pasta making machine, which looks like this:

Cool, huh? Apparently they only cost like 20 bucks. Once I have a job I might go buy one. All you need is flour and eggs to make the dough, then you run the dough through that little machine guy a dozen times, cut it into the desired shapes, and voila! Delicious homemade pasta! Joe and I actually got kinda fancy and made ravioli, which was good even though it was a little thick and took forever to cook. The ravioli was stuffed with asparagus, ricotta cheese, mint, and parmesan. It was delicious. Also, the machine was fairly easy to use even though every once in a while one of us would run the dough through incorrectly and it would get torn up a little bit. My point is, making homemade pasta is extremely fun. I highly recommend it.

See you next week! Except I will so totally blog next week before I blog about this goal, because it is finals week. I blog a lot during finals week. I also get lots of chores done.

10 April, 2009

Two lists.

Rice Krispy treats? Check.
Tonic water? Check.
Smeared eye make-up from rubbing my eyes so often? Check.
Disney Princess fruit snacks? Check.
Staying up all night to write a paper? PRICELESS.

I am normally a pretty good student. I promise. I also get quite a healthy amount of sleep, for a college student. Especially considering how many credits I am taking this semester. However, I don't like literary criticism. Never have. This is why I changed my major from English to Linguistics. Anywway, I have been putting off this 15-page paper for my Shakespeare class for days now, even though I thought I had a decent topic. Wrong! I spent hours trying to write today and I could barely squeeze out one paragraph. If I don't feel like writing about something, I simply cannot write about it.

I think this is why my grades in college do not really reflect my intelligence. I hate writing about things that do not interest me.

So anyway, I'm writing my paper about rock music now. It's a gamble, because my teacher might not like it. But a good 15-page paper that Dr. Fullmer hates is better than a 15-page paper of crappy lit crit, right? Certainly it's better than no paper at all.

More throughout the evening as the story (and the paper) develops. This may well be my first all-nighter since my sophomore year.

Red vines? Check.

06 February, 2009

I don't use the internet to be left alone.

I just read this exquisitely heartfelt tribute to the "25 things about Me" fad here, and it actually inspired me to want to write one of my own.

1. I feel terrible about the way things ended with my maternal grandmother. We had never gotten along very well, but that was mostly because she was pissed off that I joined the Church (The Mormon one, I mean) in 1992-ish (?). I cut off all contact with her when I was in high school. Nor did I go to her funeral in 2006, but now I wish I had. The odd thing is, I think I would have gotten along with the young version of her really well. My mom tells me stories about her and she was a lot like me: kinda spacey, creative, loved to dance, had a hard time following rules. I did her temple work for her after I got back from my mission, and although that was nice, I still wish I had reconciled with her while she was alive.

2. For those of you familiar with the MBTI personality test, my favorites types are as follows: INFPs (because that is what I am), ISFPs (both my brothers and a large number of my friends are ISFPs ... I really think it is my favorite to be friends with), ENFJs, and ENFPs.

3. I love mayonnaise. It is my favorite condiment. I like to eat it on peas instead of butter. I know how gross that sounds, and most people find it disconcerting to watch, so I generally eat it when no one else is around. Except Pamela doesn't seem to mind. I love you, Pamela.

4. I have little to no contact with a bogglingly large number of people that I am facebook friends with. However, I will never delete anyone, because having lots of friends makes me feel cool, and I am somewhat voyeuristic by nature. It's a writer thing.

5. I love YA novels. Particularly the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. I like them much better than trashy books written for adults.

6. That said, when I was ten or so, my mom bought me one of those crass Harlequin romance novels, and I read it cover to cover several times. It was there that I learned several crucial anatomical terms that I am too classy to list here. However, if you ask me, I will tell you.

7. As a kid, I loved coffee.

8. Additionally, as a kid I shoplifted fairly regularly, but never liked it. I only did it because one of my cousins made me do her dirty work. I was also never caught.

9. I hate it when people use the word "just" when talking about something very important to them. "I just wanted to say that I know Jesus is the Christ." Just? Just???? I have no impetus to tell anyone else how to bear his or her testimony, but my kids will be forbidden to use such a construction.

10. I probably attach too much significance to language. If you are ever in the doghouse with me, all you have to do is SAY something nice or penitent, and all is forgiven. You don't actually have to DO anything. I know this is foolish, but I doubt it will ever change.

11. There is a certain hallway in the Provo Temple near the Celestial Room, and every single time I walk down it, I feel a strong urge to dance irreverently. If no one else is around, I sometimes do.

12. One time my friend Becca ran over my foot with her car. Incredibly, my foot wasn't broken, although it was very painful.

13. When I was 14 and had the chicken pox, the pustules were concentrated on my face, neck and chest. The first time I looked in the mirror the morning I came down with the pox, I actually screamed. I believe that this was in some form of punishment for being so vain about my skin when I was in middle school.

14. I never learned the multiplication tables. I am absolutely wretched at math. This includes counting. I hate counting out loud or doing math in my head, especially in front of other people. Once, my former elementary school teacher came into a retail store where I worked, and I tried to count her change out for her, and I couldn't do it. I was embarrassed but luckily she was nice about it, otherwise I probably would have lost my job.

15. I never learned how to type. Still can't.

16. I can easily pinpoint the specific time in my life when I was the most miserable. It was in the MTC.

17. I love dinosaurs. I am excited to die so I can go to Heaven and watch movies of real dinosaurs. If this is not possible, I will be a very disappointed dead person.

18. When I was in second grade my mom bought me a training bra even though I had no need for one. I tried wearing it to school one day, but it itched so badly I took it off in the bathroom and stuffed it in my coat pocket. Later that day, on the playground, it fell out.

19. I don't like two-faced-ness (is that a word?). If I don't like someone, I find it impossible to be nice to them. Thus, if I am nice to you, congratulations! I like you. No, really.

20. On New Year's in 2005, I cussed out an old lady in a parking lot, because she was mean to my best friend. To this day, I do not feel bad about this at all.

21. On my mission, I was grabbed and kissed by men in various states of sobriety on eleven different occasions. It averaged out to once a transfer. I kept track of these instances using stickers on the back of my nametag, but when people asked me about them, I said it was to keep track of how many transfers I had been in the country.

22. I cry more often during movies about animals than movies about people. Homeward Bound: the Incredible Journey, for example, makes me cry every single time.

23. I forged several of the signatures on my Honor Society application in high school. Not because I was fibbing, just because I had forgotten to take it around and collect all the signatures I needed. The irony was not lost on me, either.

24. My favorite Hungarian word is: fogcsikorgatás. It means "gnashing of teeth."

25. Adopting my brother in 2003 was my idea. My parents don't like to tell people this, and I've never figured out why.

Well, that was fun. If there is ANYONE in the web-0-sphere who has not yet participated in this little exercise: tag.